How can I put it/ You put me on/ I even fell for that stupid love song/ Yeah, yeah /Since you been gone.
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Oh Kelly. There you were, just a small-town cocktail waitress made good; Simon safely leading you through the pop terrain. You had it all before you: charts, adoration, multi-platinum Grammy-winning records. Right?
But you didn't bet on the Fantasia's and Michelle McManuses (McMani?) of the world, did you? They trailed in your wake, cruelly trampling that legacy of yours. Now, years later (what with that embarrassing World Idol defeat to the grinning troll Nilsson), you're hurt, confused. You've begun to question whether there's a place for you and your sub-Dianne Warren empowerment ballads in our fickle hearts. Where will you turn? How far will you go?
To Sweden. Into the arms of Max Martin, to be precise. But he doesn't want you either. Oh no. He's moved on. He has no time for you and your perky pop sass. You won't find any faux-r 'n' b uptempo dancefloor fillers here. But the object of his desire is already taken. She belongs to the Matrix and Linda Perry. She has no need for him. But you do.
"En förträfflig idé!" Max exclaims with joy, "Jag kan omdanar dig som en arg rocksångare!"*
Luckily, it's truly fabulous.
On with lashings of black eyeliner, my dear, and that little wrist-cuff-glove appendage that denotes true angst. There are repetitive chords and crashing drums; a pouting verse and then A REALLY LOUD AND ANGRY CHORUS. Kelly, you're liberated! Free now to sing your inner pain, bemoan toxic bachelors and the destruction of your romantic idealism! And if that mean Simon comes around and tries to make you take that chain from around your waist, and wear generic Abercrombie clothing again? Well, you just set those moody 'real' musicians from your new band on him, OK love?
Rejoice in the new-found angst here!
*"Excellent idea! I will change you into an angry rock singer!"
Download
Oh Kelly. There you were, just a small-town cocktail waitress made good; Simon safely leading you through the pop terrain. You had it all before you: charts, adoration, multi-platinum Grammy-winning records. Right?
But you didn't bet on the Fantasia's and Michelle McManuses (McMani?) of the world, did you? They trailed in your wake, cruelly trampling that legacy of yours. Now, years later (what with that embarrassing World Idol defeat to the grinning troll Nilsson), you're hurt, confused. You've begun to question whether there's a place for you and your sub-Dianne Warren empowerment ballads in our fickle hearts. Where will you turn? How far will you go?
To Sweden. Into the arms of Max Martin, to be precise. But he doesn't want you either. Oh no. He's moved on. He has no time for you and your perky pop sass. You won't find any faux-r 'n' b uptempo dancefloor fillers here. But the object of his desire is already taken. She belongs to the Matrix and Linda Perry. She has no need for him. But you do.
"En förträfflig idé!" Max exclaims with joy, "Jag kan omdanar dig som en arg rocksångare!"*
Luckily, it's truly fabulous.
On with lashings of black eyeliner, my dear, and that little wrist-cuff-glove appendage that denotes true angst. There are repetitive chords and crashing drums; a pouting verse and then A REALLY LOUD AND ANGRY CHORUS. Kelly, you're liberated! Free now to sing your inner pain, bemoan toxic bachelors and the destruction of your romantic idealism! And if that mean Simon comes around and tries to make you take that chain from around your waist, and wear generic Abercrombie clothing again? Well, you just set those moody 'real' musicians from your new band on him, OK love?
Rejoice in the new-found angst here!
*"Excellent idea! I will change you into an angry rock singer!"
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Here's what I've always wondered: given that what inevitably gets criticized in transformations like this is less the music and more the fashion, if she kept dressing like Kelly Clarkson but sang the angry rock singer songs, would that give her more or less cred? It would be interesting, anyway. Or she could look like J.D. Samson. That would be really interesting.
Hmm, interesting point. I think it's all about repositioning her on the pop spectrum, and since the moody alienated suburban kids are just as judgemental as their teenybopper counterparts, it's a whole new look for her. Personally I prefer it, and like I said, this song is fabulous. Particularly the confused tenses in the verse where she talks in the past and then says 'Since you've been gone'.
xAbby
Oh yes, I love this song like it is my own baby. Thanks for alerting us to it. Much joy, much joy. I used to very much like Kelly when she was an AI winna but my love is fickle. Now I'm totally crushing again.
hello
Hey yeah i'm singing this song for my talent show so thats awsome right?