Fan 3 - Geek Love

Published Tuesday, November 22, 2005 by Abby | E-mail this post

“I wouldn’t call him fly/ Suspenders and a bow tie.”

Ah, the universal woe of the geek. Mocked and derided for much of their schooldays, legend would have it that these boys emerge from the cocoon of alienation with strength and chivalry, ready to sweep in and rescue women when they finally tire of their Jordan Catalano’s and are ready for real love and intimacy.

Sure. Truth is, it’s the former geeks we’ve got to worry about most, since they’ve usually channelled every moment of hurt and rejection into misogynistic fury that gets unleashed in their eternal quest to rid themselves of those stood-up, let-down memories. If we dropped by to see what poor Brian Crackow was up to nowadays, he’d be a bitter shadow of his former (obsessive, stalker) self*; copy of ‘The Game’ in one hand, mirror in the other. Steer well clear, girls.

If only Fan were on hand to disarm the bastards-in-training with her sweet ode. She likes your straight As! She digs your lack of style! She’ll ignore her friends when they ‘behove’ her to abandon you! And all to dulcet tones of elevator mood music. Bless.

* Aside from the fact he actually is a muscular, Roswell lothario

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Bonus: ’Boom’. Um. Yes. Odd, isn’t it?
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